Tuesday, May 29, 2012

I saw a snake then swallowed a bug.


The fact that I am still here to tell you about the experience (mentioned above) is a real miracle.

Before I give you the dirty details, let’s rewind…

Did you have a lovely weekend? Mine was wonderful!

I spent Friday night with my friend Alyssa, celebrating her bachelorette. We had a great time reminiscing about our college days. Also, remember the panties I mentioned last week? I ended up buying some fabric pens at Wal-Mart, along with a pair of good ole granny panties. I decided to write the lyrics to Eli Young Band’s “Oklahoma Girl.” We used to sing this song at the top of our lungs in college (we even met the band). It is especially fitting considering that she is marrying a "Texas boy."



Palm trees and sunshine because she is having a beach wedding.


Saturday, I went to the Chickasaw Cultural Center for their eagle exhibit. I took this picture of a baby bald eagle. It was so neat getting to be so close to them. If you are from Oklahoma, you should really try to make it out to the CCC. It is just breathtakingly beautiful this time of year.



Following the eagle exhibit, I went to visit my precious niece Ava. It is so hard to believe that she is going to be a year old in September. Her mother and I spent most of the afternoon discussing themes for Ava’s first birthday party. When Autumn and I get together we become expert party planners. We were both recruitment directors in Sorority; we would spend months planning out recruitment and other social events. Since college, we have focused our energy on baby showers.

Terrible, terrible iPone picture...but who could resist that precious face!


Sunday was spent doing miscellaneous things around my apartment.

Monday my brother moved to town. Watch out Ada! The Orr children have been reunited! After moving my brother’s things into his new home, we had dinner and I decided that we should go for a walk.

We were just about to walk up a few stairs when I saw movement around my feet. I look down and there is a SNAKE slithering on the ground a few inches in front of me. I gasp and that’s when it happened: I swallowed a bug. To say that I was mortified would be an understatement. I was in such a state of shock. My poor brother had no idea what had just happened. My immediate thoughts were about the snake. I ran behind my brother, unable to speak, my hands covering my mouth, my eyes in tears and you want to know what he does? He throws his hands in the air and moves away from me as if I’m the snake! Once I gain my composure, I explained what happened. He dies laughing. He didn’t see the snake, had no idea that I had just swallowed a bug. He said it looked like I was about to throw up all over him. (The truth is, I’m sure I looked like I was about to be sick, heck I’m SHOCKED I didn’t get sick).

Anyway it was probably one of the worst experiences of my life.

I’m still a little shaken up over the whole thing. My second snake encounter this month. What am I going to do?

Hope you are all recovered from your three day weekend!

Have a great Tuesday!

Friday, May 25, 2012

#H54F

Yay for three day weekends!!! Happy Friday everyone! Today I'm linking up with Lauren over at From My Grey Desk for High Five For Friday!

This week flew by (I'm not complaining)! However, I do wish things would slow down a little bit. Before we know it, we'll be in the middle of August, kids getting ready to go back to school, sweating through 115 degree heat, and Hobby Lobby will have their Halloween decor on display! Don't get me wrong, I love flying through another work week, I just wish we had a little more time to enjoy spring!

Okay, enough of that. Here is my top five for this week!

One. I ordered this swimsuit top from GAP. (To go with my black bottoms)



Two. I completed week 3 of C25K (couch to 5K)! The best part? It wasn’t that bad!
Maybe this will work after all?



Three. The season finale of Revenge was CRAZY!!!



Four. I finished my book, Bitterblue! I really hope some of you read this series by Kristen Cashore. It was wonderful!


 
Five. My brother moves to my wittle town this weekend! Yay!!!!



I hope you had a great week and I hope you have an even better 3 day weekend!!
 
Happy Memorial Day!

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Awkward and Awesome Thursday

I've been a little sporadic lately. I thought you might like a little normalcy around here. It's Thursday! One more day until a three THREE day weekend. (Sadly, Memorial Day weekend is the closest thing I get to a summer break).

Awkward


-My coworker had a toenail removed earlier this week. He was on the phone with a friend explaining the details of the procedure and his recovery. I could throw up.

-I have to decorate a pair of panties to bring to a bachelorette party this weekend. My first thought: puff paint! But…I don’t think puff pained panties would be very comfortable…any ideas on how to “personalize” panties? (Apparently she is going to guess who brought what pair). Are they supposed to be sexy? Are they supposed to represent how much I know her? Am I supposed to give clues to who I am? Either way, she will have a pair of panties that remind her of me. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I’ll be sure to blog about what I come up with.

-I have totally turned my back on Twitter… I don’t know what happened. I’ve realized that I can’t be available 24/7 to share every detail of my life so I just gave up. I get a little overwhelmed by the people who can get on and say something witty every 5 minutes. I’m just not that funny.

Awesome

-OKC Thunder beat the Lakers on Monday.

-I’ve been so preoccupied with my book that I have totally neglected my blog and my bedtime. It’s a good one y’all! I should have it finished this weekend and I promise I will share my thoughts with you.

-I’ve changed my “drinking diet.” No, I’m not talking about alcohol; I’m talking about soda and tea. I’ve been drinking only water for about a week now and I love it! My skin seems so much healthier and I feel great! I may or may not have a glass of wine in the evenings but that doesn’t count right? *a bit of advice* next time you are at Sonic, order a large water with lemon or lime. Everything taste better with Sonic ice.

Have a wonderful day!

Monday, May 21, 2012

Swimwear Nightmare

Last weekend was spent trying on swimsuits.


I know, I know, it was terrible.

I have a couple of functions coming up involving a pool or a lake, so I decided I should find something presentable to wear.

I was encouraged by Rachel’s post about swim glam. I left for my shopping adventure convinced that I would find a suit that would make me look like the epitome of 60’s glam. I was so very ambitious.

Of course, I failed. That’s the thing about swimsuits…they aren’t (by my standards) “presentable.”

Also, they were extremely picked over! Why is it that swim season hasn't "officially" began and the stores are already sold out!?

The failed attempt left me feeling insecure and ashamed of every lump and bump on my fanny.

Is this what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life? The dreaded swimsuit?

I have a bathing suit that I bought at GAP four years ago. It is solid black and fits like a dream. Sadly, it’s starting to look a little ratty. I’m not sure it’s going to make it through another summer. It’s my equivalent to the “LBD.” If it works, you work it hard! (What movie is that line from?)

So my search continues…I’ve decided that I should just invest in an awesome cover-up and lay gracefully next to the pool. Or I guess I could always buy a swimsuit and back out of rooms, never exposing my rear-end!

Why couldn’t I have gotten the super skinny genes like my sister?

Earlier when I mentioned Rachel’s post about swim glam, I didn’t tell you what I loved most about it; she said that “nobody else at the pool or beach cares about your problem areas because each one of them is thinking about their own problem areas.”

This is so true ladies!

Now if you will excuse me, I think I’ll head over to eBay in search for the miracle that is the 2008 GAP swimsuit.

I hope you all are having a wonderful Monday!


Friday, May 18, 2012

High FIVE for Friday!

Happy Friday everyone!!

Linking up with Lauren for High Five for Friday! I went over to Lauren's blog and noticed she already has 100 link ups. By the time I get this post up in running she will probably have 200! I am simply amazed! Way to go Lauren!

Okay, so here are my favorite things from this week:

One
I spent some time with my Poppa (grandpa) on Wednesday. We had such a great time together. He brought me two beautiful watercolors (Ken Hosmer Originals). My grandmother was a wonderful artist. She took master classes from Ken. My Poppa bought these for her as a gift and she hung them in her studio. I am so proud to display these in my office, I feel like I have a piece of my Grammy with me everyday.




Two
I finally spent some quality time (by quality time I mean an hour on the phone) with my best fried Autumn, the one I wrote about yesterday. We have been living in separate towns for two years now and we've done a pretty good job of keeping in touch. Nothing's better than girl talk with your best friend. Can I get an amen!?

Three
I got a new pair of running shoes! Yay! I went to a fancy place in Edmond, they measured my foot and got me fixed up with the perfect pair!


 
Four
This week I spent two nights with my girlfriends! Monday, my friend Melissa came over to watch the season finale of Once Upon a Time. Thursday, I went to a birthday party! Yay! Maybe I'm not a hermit after all?



Five
My family went to Paseo Grill to celebrate Mother's Day! Paseo Grill is my favorite restaurant in OKC! Yum!! It was nice having everyone together to celebrate our sweet Momma!



All in all, it was a pretty good week!! (and I didn't even mention all the season finales on T.V.!)

Have a good weekend!

Thursday, May 17, 2012

May Birchbox, Gossip Girl style!

This month’s box was inspired by Gossip Girl.

You should know, I've been a Gossip Girl fan since day one.


I remember watching the pilot episode with my best friend Autumn. At the time, Autumn and I had just met. I was a freshman in college, a new member in Sorority, still trying to get to know everyone. Autumn invited me over to watch Gossip Girl. I knew nothing about the show; I was just interested in hanging out with her. See, I was shopping for a big sis (If you aren’t Greek: your big sis acts like a mentor in your first year of sorority).

So I went over to Autumns and we both LOVED the show. The rest is history. She became my big sis, I was a bridesmaid in her wedding, and I was there when she had her first baby. And to think, it all started with Gossip Girl!

Right now we are going through a little funk. I haven’t talked to her in a couple of weeks. I think this box was a sign. I need to make it a priority to go visit her soon.

Autumn, if you’re reading this (which I hope you are because I plan on writing on your Facebook wall and requesting your attention) I want you to know that your friendship is so very important to me and I hate that we’ve let our lives get the best of us. I need a phone date and a weekend visit ASAP!

Okay, what were we talking about? Oh yea, Birchbox (sorry I didn’t intend to unload all my personal issues on you, thanks for listening).

So, I was very happy to receive this box. I am a true fan of the show and secretly wish I lived like the characters, don’t judge!

In my box:



BVLGARI Omnia Crystalline Eau de Toilette Spray
*Smells amazing, I love it!*

Color Club® Summer Pastels Collection
*Can't go wrong with coral! Love*

Kiehl's Abyssine Cream
*I'm a huge fan of Kiehl's products, this moisturizer is great*

 

Ojon damage reverse Restorative Conditioner
*My hair depends on conditioner. I like it okay but I much prefer my Biolage conditioning balm.*

And of course, an adorable note card that reads: “xoxo” the famous line that is used at the closing of each show.

Have a wonderful day!

XOXO, Brittney

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Has it really been a year?



That's me!

As the rest of the world is celebrating Graduations ( whether it be head start, middle school, high school, college, grad school)… I can’t help but reminisce about my own graduation.

My high school graduation was very emotional. I felt as though my senior year was filled with lasts. Last dance, last football game, last pep rally, last concert, the last musical. It was so hard to say goodbye to my friends, and eventually my family as I went off to college, never realizing how permanent those goodbyes will become.

My college graduation was much easier. It was filled with a sense of accomplishment and celebration. I was so excited about my future, already landing a job. I was ready to conquer the world (or at least south central Oklahoma).



As I look back at the past year, I can’t help but smile.

I have a wonderful job and probably the best boss ever, I’ve made some amazing friends, and I’ve gained a plethora of knowledge and experience in my field.

Also, how bout this blog? I started blogging just weeks after graduation (actually I started blogging on my first day of work) and it has become my safe haven.

It has transformed from a little hobby into a therapeutic outlet for my creativity (all while bettering my writing skills).

This blog has given me something to focus my attention to other than work, which is important for someone who went from being a busy college student/sorority girl to a career woman/hermit.

So with that being said, I look forward to the future. I sense some major changes headed my way and I couldn’t be more excited about it!

Details about those changes are coming soon!

(I’ve got to finalize a few things first hehe)

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Mom,



My pretty Momma and her big hair.

There was a time in my life when I thought I didn’t need you. I thought I was a grown up, I could face the world on my own.  We fought all the time. I didn’t have any control of my sharp tongue. Secretly, I tried to follow all the rules and constantly sought your approval. But High School was stressful for us both. I don’t know how we survived.

Yes, yes I have always had that attitude.

As I look back on that trying time in our relationship, I realize how foolish I was. If there is one thing I have learned in my 23 years of being your daughter, it’s that your love is unconditional.
Kisses!


You loved me through my terrible twos.

You loved me when I spilt a gallon of milk all over the kitchen (and didn’t tell you about it until after the gas company found the soured mop).

You loved me when I said those hateful things in high school. Remember the time I told you to shut up?

You loved me when I refused to clean my room.
You loved me when I hid my clean cloths under the bed because I was too lazy to put them away.
You loved me when I fought with my siblings.
Oh our Christmas cards...


You loved me every time I wreaked the car.

You never missed a show.

You always told me I was the prettiest girl on stage, and I think you believed it.
Remember glamour shots?

You are my biggest fan and I would be lost without your support.

Now that I am an adult, I realize that there will NEVER be a time when I don’t need you around. You really are my best friend.
My 16th birthday cruise.


Although I have better control of my tongue, I still seek your approval.

Your accomplishments, not only as a mother, but as a career woman, have inspired everything that I am.

I love the woman I have become and I have you to thank.
Nothings better than my Momma's hugs.

Thank you for always believing in me and never giving up on me.


Today is bitter sweet. I know you miss your Mom, I miss Grammy too.
My Mom and my Grammy.


Just know that I love you unconditionally and nothing will ever change that.
Pool time! (That's my Poppa's arm, he was cropped out!)


Happy Mother’s Day Mom!


Remember this day?
I love you!
Brittney

Friday, May 11, 2012

High Five for Friday!

It's the Friday before Mother's Day weekend. I'm sure some of you are running around desperately trying to find a gift for your sweet Momma...but not me! I am so excited for Mother's Day! My family has a lot of plans this weekend and I cant wait!

Linking up with Lauren for her (very famous, and ever growing) High Five for Friday link party!

One. I got my first pair of glasses this week! Read about my experience picking them out here.



Two. I was lucky enough to be in town for my Brother's fraternity formal. He looked so handsome!



Three. I love my Ada Book Club girls. We get together every month to drink wine discuss our book. This month we had Pizza, wine, and crafts! We made adorable bookmarks! (yes we have a *awesome* logo, one of the girls is a graphic designer)! Shout out to my RDR girls!



Four. If you didn't know, I have an amazing job! I get to spend a lot of time at the Chickasaw Cultural Center. I took this photo the other day. It is just gorgeous this time of year.


Five. I received the most heartfelt comment from one of my readers. She commented on this post I wrote about missing my late grandmother. It really deserves to be at the top of this list. It touched me and I thought I would share it with you (I hope she doesn't mind...)

Kari wrote:

Brittney, I'm new to blogging and I've been "stalking" fellow bloggers lately trying to get motivated to keep up my blog. Anyways, when I find a blog I like, I like to go back and read some of their previous posts. I just want you to know that you've made me feel very much more "normal" with all of your stories! From moving to a new town, to having homesick crying by myself nights, etc. But most of all, this post. My grandmother passed away on Christmas Day of this past year. She always made the BEST chocolate cream pie. After she passed away, I looked FOREVER to find the recipe in her box of recipes only to find out that she never used a recipe...she just had it all memorized. I wish that I could go back and get all of her delicious recipes that she never had written down. Thanks for sharing your story too!

Kari you totally made my day! Thank you!

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Awkward and Awesome!

Awkward

-Everything about Facebook timeline. I was bound and determined to boycott the timeline but a few weeks ago I was forced into it by the Facebook people. In protest, I've left my cover photo blank! (I'll show them!) No really, it is just because I couldn't find a picture that worked. I finally put one up this week but I still don't like it...Its hard enough finding a profile pic, now I have to have a background photo?  I'm pretty sure my friends cant handle two awkward self portraits. I chose a picture of my happy place: A coffee mug, my iPad (resting in its adorable Pencil Shavings case) sitting on the patio table next to my Dad's pool in Tulsa. Sweet Bliss. How how I wish I could be there now.

-Last week I attended a two day conference. By the end of the day Saturday I was beyond done. So I'm sitting across from this mother of four, who is expecting her fifth- God bless her, and she looks over at me and asks, "Do I look tired?" I hesitate, not sure if it is a trap, and respond politely, "No! you look great!" I proceed to ask her the same questions about myself. Her response, "Well yes, yes you do!" I laughed it off.

Awesome

-I'm still running y'all! Cross your fingers that I'll be ready for the 5K in June!

-Lunch date with my friend Melissa. We are both retired sorority girls so when we get together we plan out our entire year (socially speaking). We are like two peas in a pod! I am so excited for our "Once Upon a Time finale dinner" next week. We are having apple pie and white wine for dessert (get the snow white reference?)

-As of this weekend, I've been out of college for a year! Oh my, time has flown! I think this year might have been my best yet. I couldn't be happier with my career and the experience I have gained. It has been an absolute whirl wind and I look forward to seeing where I'll be this time next year!

Have a wonderful Thursday and don't forget: This weekend is Mother's Day!

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

My new specs!

Up until six months ago I’ve had excellent vision.

I’m baffled by the fact that last June, when I was signing up for all my health benefits at work, I decided to forgo the extra vision plan because *I thought I had perfect vision*

Now, almost a year later, I have glasses and some serious wrinkles between my eyebrows from all the squinting I’ve been doing.

So that brings me to yesterday…I’m at the eyeglass store, trying to pick out a pair of frames when it hit me: This problem I have (not being able to see things clearly) is going to be around forever.

The glasses I’m about to choose, will change the way my FACE looks. This isn’t an accessory or something I can buy in every color to go with every outfit.

These babies will be the focal point of my look every day.

Suddenly, I have no idea what type of frames to get. Big, small, square, cat eye, plastic, invisible, black, brown, tortoise. I’m sitting there surrounded by hundreds of glasses completely overwhelmed.

Obviously I shouldn’t have come alone. This decision is far too big to make on my own. I need a friend to tell me how I look.

I mean, you bring someone with you to shop for proms and weddings. Why not for glasses? Something you wear every day! To me, this shopping decision is as important as deciding what ball gown to wear to prom.

So I sat there. In front of a small vanity mirror, for TWO HOURS rotating four different frames.

This is following the 30 minutes I spent narrowing the hundreds of frames down to four.

My top four frames included a trendy Ray Ban, a classic Ralph Lauren, Juicy Couture, and a Fossil frame.

Side note: Did you know Paula Dean has a glasses brand? I didn’t either. Are glasses like the new “perfume” for celebrities? Do you think Britney and J Lo will come out with a line? Maybe Jessica Simpson?


Oh yeah, my top four.

So after looking at myself in the mirror for two hours, I decided to eliminate the Ray Bans because I’m afraid it's a trend I’ll look back on and regret. Something my kids will poke fun at me 30 years from now.

I took out the Juicy Couture pair because it had rhinestones on the side. I decided that was too much *bling bling* for my every day look.

I was left with the Ralph Lauren and the Fossil frames.

The Ralph Lauren pair was small and rectangular with a thick black plastic frame. Looked great with the black and white outfit I was wearing yesterday.

But in the end, I chose the Fossil pair because I loved the shape and the color.

They're dark enough to pass as black or brown but they have hints of a deep red or plum. Honestly, I can’t decide what color they are…I think that’s why I like them.

So, what do you think?



Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Trend Wish List

Lately I’ve been feeling a little out of touch with the spring/summer trends. I’m stuck on neutrals and I’m ready to move on!

Everywhere I go, I’m seeing bright colors, bold patterns and beautiful accessories! I love love love it but it’s hard to let go of my safe neutrals. Not to mention the fact that I don’t have an unlimited shopping budget and can’t afford a whole new wardrobe.

But, every girl has to start somewhere right?

I’ve put together a "wish list" of my favorite trends.
 


J Crew

H&M

LOFT
 

Michael Kors


J Crew

I've seen these items all over the blogosphere and I feel a little left out!

I'm pretty sure everyone I know has a gold watch! That J Crew necklace is ALL OVER  Pinterest. A chambray shirt would look amazing with some colored skinnies... The pleated skirt would be perfect for the office and how tan would my legs look under those yellow shorts?

I guess you could say I'm experiencing some fashion envy...am I alone in this?

I didn't think so.

Have a wonderful Tuesday!


Monday, May 7, 2012

Is this real life?

Have you seen this YouTube video? If not watch it. It reflects how I feel today.

To say that I am tired is an understatement. I have been on-the-go since Wednesday. My weekend began Saturday at 4:30-ish and consisted of *Sunday* in which I ran errands in the City.

Today, on this cloudy Monday, I feel like a zombie. I’m not sure if anything I’m saying (out loud/ to other people/ or to you) makes sense. Also, I’m pretty sure there isn’t enough concealer in Oklahoma to cover the bags under my eyes. The last time I felt this way was after completing an all-nighter at Relay for Life in college. Which is a little confusing considering that I have not been sleep deprived, I’ve just been busy.

Sadly, I’ve been a little MIA at my usual hangouts (Blogger dashboard, Twitter feed, Facebook, Yahoo). So I have no idea what’s been going on in your life or the rest of the world for that matter. I’ve tried posting tid bits in my spare time, read: Saturday night.

Like this photo of my evening drive in my Mom’s convertible.



Also, I might have tweeted something about the moon, it was beautiful. Apparently, it was a “supermoon?”

Other than that I’ve been in the dark.

Of course, I listened to murder by the book on my drive home Sunday. As I listened to my favorite crime show, I realized that maybe life before television wasn’t so terrible. That maybe, gathering around a radio and listening to someone tell a story is something that I would have enjoyed.

What I would give to travel back in time. To see the fashion. To eat the preservative free food. To pay a dime (or was it a nickle?) for a coke. To a time where family dinners occurred every day.

I think I could fit in there.

But today, its back to reality. My reality. Which includes work, this blog, my friends, book club, grocery shopping, cooking, weight watchers, exercising, dating (read: going somewhere where I might meet someone so I can go on a date), baby showers, weddings, getting dressed (yes, I consider that a task) and of course my beloved  DVR. The life of a modern woman living in rural Oklahoma.

Happy Monday!

Friday, May 4, 2012

High Five for Friday

Happy Friday everyone! I will be so glad to wish this week farewell!  It's been really busy at work, sadly I have to work Saturday so my weekend will consist of one day.

As usual we are linking up with Lauren over at From My Grey Desk for High Five For Friday!

One. I finally tried the Pioneer Woman's Egg in a Hole. Yum!! My Mom agreed to fix it for breakfast last weekend. (she only used a teaspoon of butter)  It was amazing!



Two. I love my new earrings. I have been eyeing a similar pair from Stella and Dot. I found these beauties for under $15 bucks at a boutique in Dallas!


Stella & Dot (priced at $48)
Mine (purchased for $15)


Three. Anyone notice the new social networking icons on the right hand side of your screen?? If not you should totally check them out!



Four. I got my first pedicure of the season.



and Five. I spent a day at the Oklahoma State Capitol this week. The State FFA choir sang the most beautiful rendition of our National Anthem. It was such a great moment, I got really sappy and patriotic. Also, it made me miss choir! Shout out to my Trojanaires! Oh how I miss you guys!



Have a good weekend!!

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Awkward and Awesome!

Hello Internet. I am blogging from my phone today so bare with me! I apologize for any format or grammatical errors that might appear in today's post.

I'm keeping it short this week!

Awkward

-The lady at the tanning salon who walked out of her room with a bra in hand. Wearing a *thin* tank top. Ladies, if you have to cross your arms to cover your loose tatas, you should probably use the 10 extra seconds it takes to put on the bra!

-You know you are from the city when you come home (after a night out with friends) and you are completely appalled by the fact that all of your neighbors are sleeping with their windows open. They're just asking for trouble! Not to mention the humidity. Yuck.

-I am incapable of riding in a car without getting car sick. Lately I've been traveling a lot for work and I got sick for the third time yesterday! It is really embarrassing and I'm sure my coworkers dread traveling with me.

Awesome

-Freshly waxed eyebrows

-The third book in my series, Bitterblue, came out this week! You can read my thoughts about the first book (Graceling) here, and the second (Fire) here.  I can't wait to cozy up with some coffee and my new read!

-Can you believe it has been in the 90's this week? I'm a little scared for summer but I am enjoying it while it lasts.

-Yesterday I was at our State Capitol for work. We saw so many kids come to visit with their school and the last group to come through was from Jenks West, my elementary school. I didn't recognize any of the teachers but it reminded me of how much fun I had there. I yelled "Go Trojans!" and they all cheered. It was pretty awesome.

See you tomorrow for #H54F!

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Running Pains


Do you remember a couple of weeks ago when I mentioned that I was running in a 5K this June??

Well if you’re new around here, you should know that I’ve never played sports so by default, I am not a runner.

It’s been a real struggle. For the past few weeks, I’ve been running with my friend Brooke.  It has been impossible to keep up with her, I always get a side cramp. It is crippling and utterly humiliating when I have to ask her to stop. I know I am holding her back.

 This week I decided to try something new. I downloaded the couch to 5K app and headed to the trail all alone. I have to say, it was much better. I didn’t get any cramps and I finished with no problem! Being able to run at my own pace really made a difference.

Of course, the entire time I’m jogging on the trail I’m thinking about the rapist/killer/attacker that is probably hiding in the bushes, regretting not bringing my mace, wondering if I could get a concealed carrier license.

I’m about half way into the trail when my WORST nightmare appeared.  I saw a snake in the middle of my path. I passed it slowly, unsure if it was dead. It was a baby snake, black with a red strip on its head.

I spent the rest of my jog thinking about possible jogging locations that are guaranteed to be snake free, only to come to the realization that a snake free outdoor trail is an unrealistic idea.

I thought about the “snake be gone” stuff my mother spreads around the yard and wondered if it is real or if it’s just another lie parents tell their kids to make the world a better place. (Still up in the air on that one).

When I approached the spot where I had my encounter with the deadly serpent, it was gone. Turns out, the snake was ALIVE!! (Insert girly scream here).

Words cannot express my level of fear and dread for the next run! I am sure to have nightmares about those dreadful creatures for weeks! I just hope I don’t use this as an excuse to stay on the couch, my nice, safe and snake free couch.